humorous poems

Autobiography | Stan Morrison - Read Poetry Online by Talented Contemporary Poets

Autobiography | Stan Morrison

I gave mrs fields my recipes, advised ann landers
I later served in the army under colonel sanders
I went to junior high with dr sholls, and then
I graduated rice university with uncle ben
I also dated Julia child
until things got too wild
she said she was on a mission
and I had to get outa the kitchen
in my opera debut I played palyacho
I knew all the greats and the not so
many more memories to mention
thank you for your kind attention
….and that’s the truth!

Animal Kingdom | Stan Morrison - Read Poetry Online by Talented Contemporary Poets

Animal Kingdom | Stan Morrison

how do you pronounce the e in giraffe
what exactly makes the hyenas laugh
rabbits are silent, wiggling their nose
sniffing for carrots or maybe a rose
i’ve noticed cats just stick with meow
wanting to say more, not knowing how
elephants play trumpets, raccoons on bassoons
they’re forming a band and will be ready soon

Nine Odd Haiku | Denny E. Marshall - Read Poetry Online by Talented Contemporary Poets

Nine Odd Haiku | Denny E. Marshall

knew had chance
name of new zine
rejection

don’t like things
that spin
removed from earth

timber area
internet usage triples
it’s login season

super computer
lightning fast and powerful
cape could be better

train station nary
locomotives on steel tracks
never seem to move

new pro football team
doubt they go to super bowl
they pick the name punts

strike long metal blade
on the thick stone prison wall
penn stronger than sword

university
offers three hundred degrees
must be an oven

the strict judge gave him
punishment of death sentence
ask, commas allowed?

History Lesson | Stan Morrison - Read Poetry Online by Talented Contemporary Poets

History Lesson | Stan Morrison

mason dixon lewis and clark
went exploring until it got dark
stumbled into the indian ocean
celebrated there with great emotion
many say the french-russian revolution
can be considered as the final solution
never mind what makes good sense
based on the facts and the evidence
make up anything and write a book
everyone’ll trust you if you’re a crook

Six Haiku | Denny E. Marshall - Read Poetry Online by Talented Contemporary Poets

Six Haiku | Denny E. Marshall

locked in your wife’s car
evil in-dash computer
seeks revenge and death

in ear
not tiny hearing aid
new smart phone

large cell phone study
find brain damage caused by tons
of useless minutes

this generation
when they give teacher apple
gift is expensive

four seasons
named
again the fall guy

superman stuck
worthy foe
superglue

More at http://www.dennymarshall.com/.

Believe It or Not | Stan Morrison - Read Poetry Online by Talented Contemporary Poets

Believe It or Not | Stan Morrison

there’s no hill in hillsboro
and no gold in goldsboro
crocodiles actually do shed tears
as proven in a court of their peers
clocks don’t really say the time
they stay quiet like a sorta mime
elephants have been known to forget
waterproof raincoats always get wet
no wonder there’s so much confusion
even a mirage can turn into an illusion

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