Subsist | Camille Clark
We subsist on the toasting
of ego, of hubris,
we gorge on a celebration
of fine false features.
We subsist on the toasting
of ego, of hubris,
we gorge on a celebration
of fine false features.
Living in my brain
is sweaty and messy,
a complicated affair.
There are many rules
and rituals to follow.
There are many stories
trickling by slowly.
Maybe this all goes
to explain the insomnia.
Sugar suede velour
darkness
closing noise up in
wordless mouth
muffled footsteps
until a pile of fine
china
clatters
to the ground.
I find myself among
the litter and the leaves,
among the cast-off elements
of many days.
I wasn’t even looking for
myself but there I was
amid the clutter and sound,
my face smiling back at me.
Sign here, date
next to your name,
initial three times after
you take note of the fine
print… here is a magnifying
glass so you can read
all of the page…
wait at least six months,
call three times, leave
an angry voice mail.
I’m sorry, we did not
receive your application.
Are you sure you sent it?
A wide mouth brimming
wants to swallow all
Grief, time, contemplation
A hunger that will not rest
at bay grinds its molars.
What happens to privacy
when your heart is ripped apart, and the secrets you had are no longer truths. Lies and ribaldry. Doff your hat and walk away from the maelstrom and milling crowds.