because the human body is not infinite
nor is it immortal at least not yet
the inevitable is only a question
of timing
perhaps it has already happened
with no way to know it
my father said goodbye and
it was sure nice to see you
wish you were closer
hardly anyone comes to see me
wish my kids were closer
don’t see you ‘old guys’ much
maybe if some were closer…
and maybe he said more
i don’t recall because
this was a litany on replay
cued by any break in the long
silence from california
washington
utah
and anywhere in new mexico
other than where he is
not that any of us mean
him any disrespect
or would ever think of offending
but life happens for us too
and there is always a cost
involved in every visit
it makes me wonder
if the complete lack of loneliness
that i feel about my own sons
and their infrequent contact
is just a way of warding off
talking the way my father does
fencing off a sense
of abandonment and
waiting for the last time